About halfway through my trip I was sitting in church. The church was a good size. The pews were made of wooden boards. The windows were open to allow some airflow, but even so it was very hot. There were no fans, no air conditioning, like we are accustomed to in America. There was no fancy projector showing video announcements. There was no sound board or expensive instruments. There were no snacks, coffee, or juice. Church in Africa is very different than church in America on the outside. We may look at what they have and think they are missing things churches need. They are not. They have the joy of the Lord in their hearts. They have hearts that want to worship and sing songs of praise. They are thankful to know Jesus; to know the way, the truth, and the life. Jesus has sent the same Spirit to live in their hearts as he has sent to live in ours - location does not matter. With joyful attitudes like this, church in Africa is simple and it is a lot of fun. It is filled with joy. Even if you don't understand the language, you understand their prayers and praises.
With that being said, this particular Sunday was a little different for me. My attitude did not become more joyful or thankful during the service. In fact, my attitude deteriorated. I went in very happy to be there. I went in excited to worship with them, and by the time I left I was just thankful it was over. Let me explain. This service lasted much longer than usual because it was Mother's Day. Church here is 1 1/2 to 2 hours usually much like in America. I was there for almost 4. Yes. I got there about 9:30 AM and left at about 1. I was hot and sweaty. My bug bites were itchy, stinging, and hurt. I was tired of kids staring at me and touching me. I did not understand the sermon because it was in Krio and Mende, so therefore I was bored. I was exhausted and I was hungry.
The problem was not the circumstances of the day. The problem was that all of the things that I was thinking about centered around me. It was all about how I was feeling, how comfortable I was, and if I had what I wanted. I was not thinking about anyone else. I was not thinking about how others hearts were being encouraged or how much they were enjoying worshipping together.
Bad attitudes stem from a selfish heart. When we stop looking for the what's best for other people, and turn our attention inward, attitudes can quickly go from good to bad, thankful to selfish. However, when our concerns are centered around the well-being of others and we stop thinking about whether we have all we need (more often than not, it's whether we have all that we want), we realize how much we have been given. We can see what we have been blessed with and how we can meet the needs of others. We stop focusing on the blessings we receive and start focusing on how we can be a blessing to others. (Matthew 25:34-40)
God is showing me how selfish I am, but he is also teaching me that through his power, that is not who I have to be anymore. No one is perfect at thinking about other's needs over our wants, but God is teaching me. He is teaching me to be grateful for what he has given me in this moment and not to worry about what is to come. (Matthew 6:25-34) He is teaching me to look outward and to use what He has given me to meet the needs of those around me. I am far from perfect at this, but thankfully God is patient.
That Sunday church would have been a lot more enjoyable had I had a thankful spirit and a good attitude. If I could have stopped thinking about myself and looked around to see the mothers we were celebrating and the joy the people were sharing, I would have been blessed. In the days afterward, people were still talking about the wonderful church service that Sunday and how happy they were that I was there to worship with them. All I could think about was what I had missed out on because of a selfish heart and bad attitude. I prayed that the next Sunday I would be able to enjoy the worship service they way they had, with a thankful and joyful heart.
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