Was it Worth it?

"Only fear the Lord and serve him faithfully with all your heart. For consider what great things he has done for you." ~1 Samuel 12:24

Ah, bug bites. They are part of life in Africa and should be expected when traveling there. I expected them and I got my fair share. In fact I can still count about 28 scars where I had gotten bit. The truth is, most of the bug bites were like every other one I had ever gotten, a red bump forms, it itches like crazy, then a few days later is gone. This was the case, except for a couple on my ankle. These started normally, then turned into rather large red rashes, which then formed into fairly good sized oozing blisters.


Seriously, how gross is that?!?

So there I was in rural Africa with that on my ankle. To top it off I was allergic to all medicine within a few hours of my village. I found that out the hard way. Anyway, with no medicine and only basic first aid materials, my only option was to pray for God to heal my ankle and do whatever I could to keep it clean. In the days and weeks to follow, the blistering mess that was my ankle, turned into an open wound, then scabbed (or as they say in Africa, "dried up"). I figured that God had healed my ankle and He did. It didn't hurt or itch and was simply a nice scar. It never prevented me from teaching or spending time at the Children's Home.

The doctors back home put me on a mild antibiotic when I got back to be safe. Then a month or so later I started not to feel well. I went to a different doctor who had several concerns, ordered a MRI and found out the infection had settled in my tendons. I mean seriously, who has to get a MRI because of a bug bite and how do you explain that to the radiologist... The infection worked itself out and now I'm working on restrengthening my ankle.

Anyway, even with all this, I would still go back to Sierra Leone and am praying God sends me again. When serving God, he doesn't necessarily protect you from harm. Our safety is not His greatest concern, nor should it be ours. His greatest concern is that people know His love for them and that His name be glorified. Therefore, our greatest concern should match. We should be so caught up in the love of God and His love for people, that we are willing to risk everything so that others can know that kind of love.

What's Next?

"Let all that you do be done in love." ~1 Corinthians 16:14

I've been getting this question a lot lately. What's next? Well, before I went to Sierra Leone the first time, I knew I wanted to form relationships with the people there. I didn't want this to be a one time trip. So, yes, I am hopefully going back, although no details have been discussed.

Instead of going with Global Outreach again, I am pursuing going with Let Them LOL. It just makes more sense logistically. LOL is an amazing organization that loves children and people (check them out at www.ltlol.com). They have given villages clean drinking water and have given orphaned children a home... all in the name of Jesus. This is what I want to do. I want to love people, especially children who have nothing, all because of the love Jesus has given to me.

I can't think of a better way to invest my life than by giving orphans love and an education, the poor access to clean water, and sharing the love of Jesus through it all.

Flashback: Nap Time

"And he said, “My presence will go with you, and I will give you rest.” ~Exodus 33:14

One of my favorite parts of my trip was the children's Bible study I held daily. Bible study was from 1 to 2, kids would start showing up at 12:15 and would leave by 2:45. There would be people ranging in ages from 1 to 19 or so. It was relaxed, casual, and a whole lot of fun.

The one year old boy, Poppe, would come down with the other children from the children's home and would be very fussy every now and then. After all, one year olds need naps. The first time it happened I noticed the other kids talking about taking him back so he wouldn't bother anyone. As they were talking, the crying boy was just wondering around the porch. I picked him up and within a minute he was asleep on my shoulder. So I held him as I taught.

The only time Poppe would sleep in my arms was when I was teaching, and I loved every second of it!

Jesus says, "whoever welcomes little children in my name also welcomes me." So that is what I tried to do. It didn't matter what the child needed, I would do what I could to meet their needs and make sure they knew they were love. Sometimes that meant explaining that they needed to apologize to or forgive another child, sometimes it meant giving them water or a small snack, and sometimes it meant letting a child sleep in my arms as I taught the Word of God.

Flashback: The Joys of Teaching

"A joyful heart is good medicine, but a broken spirit drains one's strength." Proverbs 17:22

Even though I have been back in the states for a little over a month, Sierra Leone is always in the back of my mind. Everything reminds me of my time there and God is continuing to teach me things about Him through my experiences there. I wanted to share one of my favorite memories...

I went up to Hope's Rising for our daily tutoring time. Nothing was set up and the kids were running around playing and doing their chores - a fairly typical scene. I went over to talk with the director of the home and saw the stack of report cards, one for each child.

Before I continue, you need to know that filling out the report cards are not easy for the teachers. I will never complain about having to enter grades into a computer and simply printing them out again. For each child the teacher writes down 3 scores (one for each term). The passing grades (above 50%) are written in blue and the failing grades (below 50%) are written in red. If the teachers make a mistake they either have to find chalk to cover up their mistake or cut out a small square of paper to put over it because there are no extra copies and no white out. Then they have to find the average, which becomes the child's final score. It doesn't end there. Then the teachers have to look at the whole class and rank each child in the class. It is a long process all done by hand and usually done without a calculator.

As I was looking through the report cards I was pleased to find very few red marks and the blue marks were fairly high (60s and 70s) for the most part. A celebration started at Hope's Rising. There were high fives, hugs, kisses, and smiles. I lost count of how many times I said, "I am so proud of you" or "Your hard work paid off" or "You are so smart!"

Morie and Nanah celebrating their end of the year results for school.

We never did get to tutoring that day. Instead we celebrated all of their hard work for hours. This was more important since there aren't many times these kids get to just be kids. They don't get praise for their work very often. They do not have parents that tell them how proud of them they are. The compliments and positive comments just don't happen often. Celebrating large achievements happens at times, but rarely do these kids get to celebrate the small ones (like finishing class 1 and being promoted to class 2). I don't know about you, but I could use a little more celebration in my life and a little less stress. I was reminded that day to stop and enjoy the moments, no matter how ordinary they seem. After all, it was God that said, "A joyful heart is good medicine." My prayer is that God would help me and those I know to stop and take time to celebrate life's blessings.

Every Child Deserves an Education

Galatians 6:10 ~ "Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers."

It's been a couple weeks since I've been back in the states. The culture shock is starting to subside and I am starting to feel more like myself again. I don't think I'll ever be back to what used to be the normal me. This summer changed me and gave me new perspective on life and why I teach. I teach because every child is important and loved. Every child deserves an education. Every child deserves to be given resources to help them become successful members of society. Every child deserves to have someone in their corner, believing in them and cheering them on. I want to be that person for my students.

Here is a picture of the preschool class in Sierra Leone.

When I first walked into my classroom in Colorado (the same classroom I have been teaching in for two years) I was a little overwhelmed. My job here didn't seem as important as it used to. I didn't feel like I would make a difference here because these kids already have access to a good education.

I had to ask myself, do I truly believe every child deserves an education or do I just want to teach the children who were born into a rural village with very little access to anything? I do believe every child deserves an education. My job here, teaching children who can buy school supplies and who have access to so many resources to help them learn, is no less important than teaching, loving, and encouraging the children in Mokanji.

This is a picture of one of the primary schools I worked with.

Just like the children I taught this summer, my students for the upcoming school year deserve a good education. They deserve to have someone believe in them and to show them they are loved. It doesn't matter how much or little a child has. It does not matter what environment a child was born into - they don't have control. Every child deserves a good education.

To all the teachers out there...No matter where you teach, no matter who your students are, or what their background is, every child deserves a good education, which makes your job important.

Welcome Home

"Welcome Home" - it's a bittersweet phrase. I could not be happier to be home and to see the people I love again. I love being home and was ready to come home by the end of my time in Sierra Leone. However, part of my heart is still in Mokanji. Part of me wants nothing more than to walk up to the Children's Home and love on the kids there. Part of me simply wants to go to Hubbard's store and sing and play with Milondo. It's bittersweet and no matter where I am, part of my heart will be half way around the world.

It always takes time to readjust after a trip like this and I knew it wouldn't be easy. I knew it was going to be really difficult to process everything that happened this summer. There are a lot of emotions involved. There is a lot of excitement and happiness coming home, but with that there also comes feelings of guilt, anger, and sadness.

I often find myself thinking, "It's not fair. It's just not fair." It's not fair that I have running water and people there have to walk to pump water and carry it back on their heads. It's not fair that I don't question whether or not I will eat dinner tonight AND I have access to a great variety of food, but in Mokanji, if they have the means to buy food at all it will be rice and some sort of sauce made of leaves (cassava leaves or potato leaves). It's not fair that I get to teach in a big classroom with access to technology for my students to use and almost unlimited pencils, but the teachers in Mokanji don't have the resources to give their students to ensure their success, sometimes not even a pencil. I could go on and on because there is so much that is just not fair.

Although it's not fair, I can do something about it. God commands us to love each other as Jesus loved us. God wants us to get out of our comfortable worlds that have us at the center and step out to really love someone, to bring His hope to people who desperately need it, and to ultimately glorify Jesus through it all. Love may look different in various situations, but there is almost always a cost. It may cost us our money, time, or talents to love others, but it will have a cost and the cost is always worth it!

Everything that went into this summer was worth it. I am so thankful God used me to teach and love the kids of Mokanji this summer. I am grateful that God has allowed me to be part of what He is doing in Mokanji and by God's grace, I pray I will return one day.

Faces of Mokanji

Thank you so much for those of you that have supported me this summer. This was not my ministry, it was yours too. I was the one that was physically in Mokanji, but those of you that were praying, support me financially, donated school supplies, or spent time sharpening close to 1000 pencils with me - you were here in spirit. God worked through your prayers and giving in the same way he worked through me. You made a difference in the lives of the people I met and interacted with. Because you also joined God in what he is doing in Mokanji, I want to introduce you to some very important people in Mokanji…

Shadrach and Fatmata Hubbard - Mr. Hubbard is one of the most humble men I have ever met. It was a joy to teach their daughter Milondo in nursery school. One of my favorite parts of my day was walking down the the Hubbards store and visiting Fatmata. Usually I needed bread or some other food, but there were times I would just walk down there, sit, and enjoy a coke as I talked with Fatmata and the kids. They would also let me stay under their shelter when I got caught in the rain. This family is great. I really can't say enough good things about them!

Reverend Joseph Moseray - Joseph is the national host for Global. He was the one that met me at the airport, got me to where I needed to go, and answered all of the many, many questions I had.

Osmani and his son Ibraham - Osmani was the driver. He was willing to take me anywhere, even though many times I chose to walk when it was within Mokanji. However, if where we needed to go was not in walking distance, Osmani had it taken care of. His son Ibraham was a huge help during the daily children's Bible studies during the last 3 weeks of my time in Mokanji. Ibraham was also one my favorite people to play cards with.

Priscilla and Juliana- These were two teachers at the nursery school I worked at for 3 of the weeks I was in Mokanji. I enjoyed our many talks about what God was teaching us or the importance of education and teaching.

Alpha - The best tailor in Mokanji! He created many beautiful shirts for my family and I. He is wanting to become a pastor and is hoping to get trained in the next year.

Ashia, Rose, and Sia - They run the Children's Home. They care for 27 children, most of whom do not have anyone else to care for them. These women are great examples of Jesus' love. They are laying down their lives daily, giving everything they have, to make sure these kids know they are loved, get an education, have a safe place to sleep, and eat everyday. I am in awe of these women!

The Kingdom of God Belongs to Such as These

Matthew 19:14 ~ "Jesus said, "Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these."

Very few things warm my heart as much as a smiling and laughing child. Put 27 children, most of whom are orphans, in a Children's Home and there are many smiles. They laugh and smile as they swing on their new swing set. They laugh as they chase the dogs and roosters around the compound. They cheer when they score a goal on their dirt football field (soccer field). They giggle when they see a snap (picture) of themselves. They run, laugh, play, and smile. Yes, they have pain, sorrows, and tears, but they show their smiles far more often.

These children also work hard. I had the privilege of tutoring them in the afternoons. They would work at their schoolwork for an extra two hours every day after school was over. They didn't complain and they completed their work daily. Many of these kids had not been in school before, so they are working hard to catch up. It was good to see all of their hard work pay off when their teachers would comment on how well they were doing and how fast they were learning. I really enjoyed my time teaching these kids. They have a lot to be proud of. When they got their results of the school year, we took a day off of studying to celebrate!

These children can teach the world a lot. These children are a blessing to everyone that has a chance to meet them. I am so thankful I was given the opportunity to meet these kids and spend six weeks with them. I will always remember these 27 wonderful children. I will remember the games played, the hugs given, and the laughs shared. I will remember their songs, their cuddles, and their smiles. These kids are no longer “orphans in Africa” or “needy children” in my mind as they were when I first found out I was coming to Mokanji. Now I know their faces, names, and stories. They are my friends. They are brothers and sisters in Christ and they will be in my heart forever.

Bad Attitudes and Selfish Hearts

About halfway through my trip I was sitting in church. The church was a good size. The pews were made of wooden boards. The windows were open to allow some airflow, but even so it was very hot. There were no fans, no air conditioning, like we are accustomed to in America. There was no fancy projector showing video announcements. There was no sound board or expensive instruments. There were no snacks, coffee, or juice. Church in Africa is very different than church in America on the outside. We may look at what they have and think they are missing things churches need. They are not. They have the joy of the Lord in their hearts. They have hearts that want to worship and sing songs of praise. They are thankful to know Jesus; to know the way, the truth, and the life. Jesus has sent the same Spirit to live in their hearts as he has sent to live in ours - location does not matter. With joyful attitudes like this, church in Africa is simple and it is a lot of fun. It is filled with joy. Even if you don't understand the language, you understand their prayers and praises.

With that being said, this particular Sunday was a little different for me. My attitude did not become more joyful or thankful during the service. In fact, my attitude deteriorated. I went in very happy to be there. I went in excited to worship with them, and by the time I left I was just thankful it was over. Let me explain. This service lasted much longer than usual because it was Mother's Day. Church here is 1 1/2 to 2 hours usually much like in America. I was there for almost 4. Yes. I got there about 9:30 AM and left at about 1. I was hot and sweaty. My bug bites were itchy, stinging, and hurt. I was tired of kids staring at me and touching me. I did not understand the sermon because it was in Krio and Mende, so therefore I was bored. I was exhausted and I was hungry.

The problem was not the circumstances of the day. The problem was that all of the things that I was thinking about centered around me. It was all about how I was feeling, how comfortable I was, and if I had what I wanted. I was not thinking about anyone else. I was not thinking about how others hearts were being encouraged or how much they were enjoying worshipping together.

Bad attitudes stem from a selfish heart. When we stop looking for the what's best for other people, and turn our attention inward, attitudes can quickly go from good to bad, thankful to selfish. However, when our concerns are centered around the well-being of others and we stop thinking about whether we have all we need (more often than not, it's whether we have all that we want), we realize how much we have been given. We can see what we have been blessed with and how we can meet the needs of others. We stop focusing on the blessings we receive and start focusing on how we can be a blessing to others. (Matthew 25:34-40)

God is showing me how selfish I am, but he is also teaching me that through his power, that is not who I have to be anymore. No one is perfect at thinking about other's needs over our wants, but God is teaching me. He is teaching me to be grateful for what he has given me in this moment and not to worry about what is to come. (Matthew 6:25-34) He is teaching me to look outward and to use what He has given me to meet the needs of those around me. I am far from perfect at this, but thankfully God is patient.

That Sunday church would have been a lot more enjoyable had I had a thankful spirit and a good attitude. If I could have stopped thinking about myself and looked around to see the mothers we were celebrating and the joy the people were sharing, I would have been blessed. In the days afterward, people were still talking about the wonderful church service that Sunday and how happy they were that I was there to worship with them. All I could think about was what I had missed out on because of a selfish heart and bad attitude. I prayed that the next Sunday I would be able to enjoy the worship service they way they had, with a thankful and joyful heart.

Many Names

I have been called many things here in Mokanji. I have been called Auntie, Teacher, Mommy, Ann (it is difficult for them to say Erin) and most often pumuwe, which means 'white person'. Pumuwe is yelled as I walk down the street or drive by in a car. I can't go anywhere without hearing the word pumuwe. Occasionally, I am called Erin.

One night during dinner I was given my African name. After we had eaten, I was sitting with three men who I have been working with and who have been my hosts. They were teaching me useful Mende and Krio phrases and words I should know. They also laughed with me at my stories of how I was attempting to embrace the culture here. Then they mentioned how I needed an African name. They said names were given as they watched people interact with the community. The name should reflect personality. I was a little nervous at this point thinking my name would mean 'one with lots of questions' or 'one who worries about silly things.' However, as the talked about previous names given, they came up with one for me.

They named me Nyanda, which means 'one of our own.' It was touching that they would give me such a wonderful name. They said they were giving me that name because they saw I was trying to be like the women in the community. I wanted to embrace their culture. They also mentioned that if I were one of their own I would want to return to Mokanji after this summer. I do not know what God has in store. I do not know if I will ever return to Mokanji. I do know, that for this summer, I am Nyanda - one of their own.

Joy in the Simple Things

1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 ~ "Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you."

I have found the hardest times here are the times I am by myself, not doing anything productive. Don't get me wrong, it is great to have time alone to read a book, pray, or journal and reflect on the day. But the times, when I don't have anything to keep me focused, are hard. The times I am not teaching, spending time with the people here, or growing in my walk with God are the most lonely and discouraging. However, just like anywhere else, you have to choose what you focus on. Either the sorrows or the joys. It does not take much to find joy here. Some might think it would be hard to find considering the lifestyle, but it is not.

Joy is found in the simple things. Joy is having a child in worn and torn clothing running to give you a hug. Joy is being able to encourage a fellow teacher to continue to love her students even though it would be easy to justify leaving the profession for a better paying one or one that pays at all(the government here is not very good at paying teachers in a timely manner, so many of them go without pay for long periods of time). Joy is looking into the eyes of an orphan and being able to tell them that they are loved, not only by me and their Aunties (caretakers), but by the One who created the universe. Joy is giving the thirsty a drink of water and the hungry something to eat. Joy is giving headmasters school supplies and seeing their faces light up knowing their teachers have more resources to teach and their students have more resources to learn (by resources, I mean a pencil and paper). Joy is walking everywhere and getting to constantly meet new people. Joy is teaching an elderly man how to use a camera and hearing him exclaim, "I am perfect!" after looking at a picture he just took. Joy is listening to people's stories. Joy is telling someone about Jesus, the God who loves them so much that He died for them. Joy is simple.

Life is Hard, but It Can Still be Fun

Life is hard in Mokanji. Before the war, this village had a lot. It had good schools, electricity, and a healthy population. The war destroyed a lot. Life is hard here, even for the "wealthy." Basic chores here consist of walking to the well with a 5 gallon bucket and carrying it back home on their heads, cooking a meager meal over an open fire, doing laundry by hand and hoping it doesn't rain long enough to let the clothes dry. It is hard for people here to afford school for their children (there are 3 terms, each term costs about 35,000 leones, the equivelant to $8.75). It is hard for people here to afford food as well. Life here is hard and I have great respect for the men and women who are able to keep their families and households running.

On the other hand I am very blessed here. I am staying in a house that is very safe with locking doors. I have electricity, running water, and one of the only refrigerators in Mokanji. Heck, even the toilet flushes. The worst part is that there have been many times I have caught myself thinking, "If only I had this or that…" Seriously, I am disgusted (and to be honest, pretty embarrassed) with myself. How selfish my heart can be. This is why I need Jesus. I need Jesus to continually show me how great he is and how I am not.

I will be honest, even with the "luxurious" house I get to stay in, it is still Africa. I still come home to find lizards and many insects in my house. In fact there are so many insects I have created a few games that I get to play every night. The first is simple - how many ants can I kill in my kitchen. The tricky part is as soon as the light turns on they run. You have to be ready with weapon in hand, whether that is a cup or shoe or book. My record is 9. The second is also very simple - to shower before I count 10 bugs. The first few days I did not do very well at this game and often lost. However, I have now gotten quite good at showering in 5 minutes or less and can usually win. I have not been able to win the nights I have to shave, but I will keep practicing. :)

Just because life is hard, does not mean life is not fun! This is what I have learned from some of the poorest of the poor. Life is fun, but sometimes you have to get creative!

The Jesus Film: Old and New Memories

A few days ago I had the privilege to go with the Hopkins to a nearby village. Mike teamed up with some local pastors to do an outreach with the Jesus Film and some preaching. As I sat there with people I did not know, watching the Jesus Film in a language I did not understand, I couldn't help but think of my two weeks in Angola three years ago. I thought of the team I went with and all the good memories. I thought of the people who couldn't help but to touch our hair. I thought of the starry night sky we sat under. I thought about our hosts and the friendships formed. But mostly I thought about the 1600 people who came to Christ during our time there. I thought about the people we met and the lives God changed.

Now when I watch the film, I will think about Sierra Leone as well. I will think about sitting next to Moni and Adi. I will think about how they were fascinated with my hair and skin. I will remember their laughter and their smiles. I will think about the villages God wants to transform here in Sierra Leone.

It was so good to be reminded of what God has let me be a part of in Africa before this trip and what he is allowing me to experience and take part in this summer. I am very blessed and thankful to be able to be here and to have the life I do.

My First Week in Mokanji

I have been in Mokanji almost two weeks. Each day gets better as I learn more about this community, but I am homesick. I was not thinking that this summer would be a sacrifice, but an adventure--and what an adventure it has been so far!! I knew I would be sacrificing my personal comfort, but really that is not a big deal. However, I do miss everyone greatly and realize now that it is a big sacrifice to go to a place where communicating with people back home is not easy or even possible most of the time. But still, with sacrifice, God has blessed me and has taken me on this adventure with Him so that I might join in with what he is doing here!

There is another American family, the Hopkins, on the compound for another week and a couple here with the Peace Corps. They have been a huge blessing to me as I try to figure out life here in Mokanji. Life here moves slowly and everything is on African time. I am learning that if someone says they will be there at 4:00, it really means in the 4:00 hour or sometime after. Also, the culture here is very relational. It is important to say hello to everyone when you enter a place or take time to say hi to people on the road. The Hopkins are also kind enough to share food with me, which is mostly carbs. Rice, yams, and bread are staples of our diet here. We also eat a lot of pineapple, cassava, and ground nut soup. It is very hot and humid. The rains are the heaviest I have ever seen and it is a blessing when they come because it cools everything down.

I have never seen poverty like this before. Even the blessed ones have nothing by American standards. It is very humbling to see. The need is absolutely overwhelming. I feel like working here is like trying to empty the ocean with an eyedropper. However, God loves every single person in this village, so if I can help just one person the trip will be worth it.

I have observed and taught in two primary schools, teaching class 4. I teach math and English and enjoy it very much. I am also assisting at the Nursery School and am becoming good friends with the teachers there. They are young and very fun to be around. I also have been helping tutor the kids at the Children's Home. Since many of them have not gone to school before they are very behind, but are learning quickly.

The Internet the Hopkins are graciously allowing be to use is weak. I will upload pictures when I return. Please continue to pray for me as the trip unfolds and God allows me to be a part of his plan in Mokanji!

Facing My Fears

There are only a few more days before I leave. I am ready, but I would be lying if I said I wasn't a little nervous. There has been a lot on my mind that I have been nervous about - most of it is pretty silly to be honest. Here are some examples of the ridiculous things I worry about: will I remember to bring everything and would it fit in my bag (thankfully it does), will I be able to handle the 6-7 hour bus ride with no bathroom breaks, will I be able to handle the bugs and humidity, etc... Seriously, these are things I really shouldn't worry about.

My family also had some concerns. I can't blame them though, they are my family. They asked some good questions that I hadn't quite thought through (like what I would do if the person picking me up at the airport never showed up and other similar questions). Although I now have answers to these questions, my family is still a little nervous.

Fear happens. It's part of life. We all experience it, but what counts is whether or not you choose to let it control you. You can either back down, give up, and walk away or you can face it head on. I choose the latter. I am able to face my fears because of Jesus. Jesus is also the reason I can reassure my family.

There are so many references in the Bible where we are told not to be afraid. God knew that we would be afraid and need that reassurance. He tells us over and over that He will take care of our needs (Philippians 4:19), He will protect us (2 Thessalonians 3:3), and He has our best in mind (Romans 8:28).

With His promises in mind, I have packed my bags and I am ready to go share the hope we have in Jesus and His love with the people in Mokanji (the village I'll be in). I can't wait to meet the kids in Mokanji. I can't wait to work with the teachers at the local schools and the leaders of the church. I am choosing Jesus and His will for my life (Jeremiah 29:11) over my fears.

Two Weeks Until I Leave

So I have joined the blogging world. I've been hesitant to do this because so many of my friends who blog are great with words and are constantly sharing their wisdom. To be honest, I thought who would want to read what I think or about my ideas. However, I want to share my experiences in Sierra Leone this summer with whoever wants to read about it. I will update as much as possible, which will be minimal since I will hardly have electricity, let alone internet. I have been told I will have internet the first night and last night and if I need to go to the capital city of Freetown or Europe for medical reasons (I am praying that wont happen). My intention when I return is to update things God teaches me throughout the summer and how He works in the lives of the people I will be working with.

I am two weeks away from leaving for Sierra Leone to work with churches, schools, and orphanages in Mokanji for 6 weeks. I have gone on mission trips before so the idea of being in a country completely different from my own doesn't scare me, in fact I am very excited about it! God has used previous missions trips to mold my heart for Him. He has broken my heart for His creation, His people. He has brought people to himself and allowed me to be a part of it.

However, all of the trips I've participated in have been with teams. I have always gone with a group of other believers. I never thought much about it, but there is a great amount of security with going overseas with a team. That is not so this time. I will be going to Sierra Leone by myself. I will be meeting and staying with missionaries once I arrive, but as far as preparing and scheduling, it's just me. This sounds silly, but that didn't really sink in until a couple of weeks ago. All of a sudden I was terrified and overwhelmed just thinking about it. God is so good though and has taught me how completely inadequate I am. He has blessed me with a whole new level of dependence on Him. I've been thinking about and clinging to Philippians 4:13, "I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength" and Matthew 19:26, "Jesus looked at them and said, 'With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.'” Because Jesus, my Lord, is with me I can breathe. I can have confidence in what I am doing, knowing that Jesus is with me every step of the way. The fact is that I am not brave. I am not courageous. I am simply following Jesus and putting all confidence in Him. He has never let me down, and I know He will come through for me this summer. I can't wait to witness how He changes the people in Mokanji with His love.